有时候的我会很好，有时候的我会很不好。。。现在的我很努力变会以前的我。。。因为他认为我太过自由和放纵而这是现在的我。。。说真的，我很不想变回以前的那个又安静又不会保护自己的我。。。现在的我真得很好啊，我变坚强了，会自我保护了，独立。。。为什么你不尝试喜欢现在的我？ 为什么总是要求变回以前的我？ 当我在慢慢的变回以前的我，我会变得很安静但不代表我没心情但你又不喜欢这样子的我。。。 到底你想怎样？ 放过我好不好? 我只是想一个人好好的疼我而已。。。 对不起，我知道我很任性。。。有时候你会让让我，迁就我，但我真的只是想撒娇而已。。。
为什么总是要一直的吵架。。。 够了，我累了。。。 我不想再跟你吵了。。。 每个人都有自己发泄情绪的方法而我选择用哭来发泄因为这样子会比较轻松吧。。。 哭不一定要等到莫些事情发生了才哭。。。 我说过当我哭完后我就没事，但你却不相信。。。
我要怎样做才能够让你心满意足？我很善忘，所以提醒我就好了但不要罗索因为这样子会很烦。。。
I know i’m useless to think back all da past things… But i just can’t stop my mind…
Wad happen to me…? Why i turn into diz kind of person…? I feel so jealous and sad n happpy too… I’m reli useless rite…? I cried…
Da whole week juz feel very moody… Tryin not to be like diz… But how?
Can i reli turn back da time…?
I reli reli regret to let go…
I reli don’t like v goin on diz way…
Kuai Kuai
This Kuai Kuai I bought it during November 2005… And its name Shelbie… Actually I wanna bought it for him but its too cute so i kept it…
This Kuai Kuai reli means a lot to me… Cause its symbolise him for me…
Everythings that i’m happy and not happy, i told him… So he knew a lot of my secret… From the day i broke up with that guy, i always keep it reli properly.. Every trip where i go i’ll sure bring it along… Cause i juz can feel that he juz around me although i lose him… Maybe i’m juz that silly treat it as him…
From the day he asked me to STOP loving him, my heart reli reli hurts… So i promise him that i’ll let go but its reli hard for me… He had a gf rite now and everyday seeing them together and happy, my hearts juz like being cut by half maybe worst than that… But i have to pretend that i’m nothing wrong still be the happy me… But its reli hurts… I promise to let go but why should i let go? Why…? Why i just can’t love him as normal days i am…?
They day on new year, 1/1/2009, i went to genting wit my cousins… And i lost my Shelbie there… Cause my cousin bro forget to take it back after playing… That nitez i cried out loud… the whole nitez i reli dint sleep at all…
Jz thinking those memories i had for the past few years, and now all gone… I blaming myself the whole nitez that i already cant stop him from leaving me and now just a tortoise why i juz cant protect it… I’m sorry to him…
Maybe to him, i’m annoying… But for me, he’s always da bez… Although sometimes i reli cant hide my feelings so i’ll always pip him wheneva i can… juz a look reli will satisfied me… Although everyday hope that he’ll treat me as normal frenz n talk to me but juz don knw he cant make it… During house practice and just so happen that i’m in the same house with him… Well, he’s always so friendly to others but why not me… Izit reli hard for him to just say hello wheneva he pass by?
I hate the life of pretending but wad can i do…? His gf is a kinda close frenz to me and can you just imagine wheneva she say something bout him in front of me and how i feel? Most of my frenz scolded me silly… Well i guess i am…
The nitez for reflection in LTC camp… I cried cause thinks back those five days and he juz treat me transparent… Well, i guess he reli dun know how does it feels…
So many times i wanna ask him, am i just no one to him?
I’m really feel sad when I’m looking at him but he din saw me…
Although its really happy that i can see him for so many days in a week but its really more than enough d…
Do he know that i’m still waiting for him?
All my life, i prayed for some one like him…
I think i finally found him…
Never wanna letting him go again…
Don’t wanna miss a chance to tell him that i still love him…
But i dare not to let him know…
Maybe if i ask, he’ll tell me that we should study first…
But i think it’s ok…,maybe…
I really wish to be his girlfriend once again…
I really promise that i really won’t hurt him again…
cause i finally understand that just like people said…
"When its gone then you only know how to appreciate…"
I’m very happy to see him happy everyday although i never talk to him in school…
Just can watching him from far away…
I don’t know whether did he noticed me too?
Or i’m just transparent…
Or i’m just a passer by…
Sometimes real jealous to the girl who same class with him…
Cause they are so clever enough…
Not like me…
Everytime i’m da one to start sms him first…
Then he’ll reply me…
Only one sms is enough to make me happy for da whole day…
Got few times he started to sms me first…
That time i really can’t describe my feeling that i’m real happy till all day long…
But i don’t know how he feel about me…
I’m really afraid he feel annoying when i sms him…
That’s why i was trying not to sms him everyday just once a while…
Hope he’ll start da conversation with me in school…
Its real shy when i get closer or when i see him…
Dare not to talk him also…
Hmm… Don’t know why…
>>>都不知道最近走什么狗运… 一直不见手机… 这一次不见已经是第二次了… 而且是同样款式的手机… 我快疯了… 去年11月29号才刚不见W850i… 今天又再不见… 我很气…!! >>>去年一不见的时候,我就去买回一模一样的手机回来… 因为不想让我妈发现… 幸好那个电话店的人,我认识… 所以我就跟他们说我慢慢还他们钱… 就在上个星期六而已,我还完了他们… 却今天又不见了… 这次我妈知道我不见电话… 她没有骂我… 只是说我为什么怎么不小心… 我哭了整个早上…
>>>我妈和我爸既然安慰我… 我很感动… 因为我以为他们会把我骂到很惨… 可是他们没有… 我很恨那个偷手机的人… 恨不得他早点死…!!
今天的我很不开心,因为我觉得我的生活越来越没意思了… 很闷,很无趣… 自从那些事情发生后,我突然感觉到原来我那么没用… 有时候被一个人喜欢但你却不喜欢他的时是一种困扰… 因为常会认为我伤害了人家… 不知道要怎样拒绝也不知道要怎样开口才不会伤害;了对方… 我了解那个痛苦因为我也是那个喜欢人家但人家都不喜欢我… 至少跟他联络,传个简讯或者是通个电话原来是很开心的… 错过的人总是最喜欢的… 这句话是真的… 曾经的我错过了他… 所以啊,我到现在都不接收任何人… 我想等他… 因为我发现我真的好喜欢他哦…
Well i broke up already two months and twelve days… Its have been so hard for me to recover a bit… That have to thanks to all my friends there been so good to me and so kind… Hehez… Now i’m much better than last time i am coz i more open minded … ( i think) and have more and more friends… Thats why we should have friends because they will stay by your side when they know you needed them… Actually i’ve been missing him so much but i couldn’t say it out to him because relationship between me and him was already over… Although one month ago i was waiting him to come back to me again but i know it was useless because he was not the one who loved me so much… He told me should we try it again… I wanna answer yes but i couldn’t because he wants me to accept the fact that he is smoking and scolding all kinds of bad words… ( i think all guys do)… I can’t stand he’s smoking because my health is not very good d… That’s why i didn’t accept him back.. Many friends told me too.. If i accept him back … They will look down on me because He’s Not A Good Guy… Those who don’t know him does not understand him actually he’s a good guy… He can sacrifice anything for his girlfriend but that just was last time bout him… But today… He change a lot… And i just can stand on my place to watch over him and pray for him and his family… I just so hope to tell him that i’ll be missing him always in my heart although we can’t be together again but I got all your memories in my mind… I’ll never forget bout it…
I feel very miserable… Juz feel tht evrything was goin wrongly… Wad happen to me…? I reli reli very sad… sumbody can help me…? I think no rite… Haiz… All hav to depends on myself… Reli afraid tht i’ll lose someone… Is there any way to get back to the old time…? 
today… very boring… feel to dance … but hav to stay at home… haiz…
Sometimes u never know wad loves mean till u tried all ur best to love someone… and yet sometimes there is no answer till u find ur own answer… no one in this world is perfect till u find ur love one n u’ll think he’s da perfect ones u ever met… loves is blind everyone said so but izit reli that true? If u reli love someone u dun nid to be mind of his look bcoz u love jus the way who is he… not his look… i’m very happy coz i found one who i very love… He is da perfect guy i ever met… but v dun have tht fate to b together… v r classmate whn v in kindergarten n thn till form 1 v met back each other… i’m very very happy… till form 3 one night i b his gf n thn very happy for five months… n thn v broke up… actually i’m very regret… reli very regret… but if i love him i should let him go… n since he day v broke up… i put all his love in the bottom of my heart so whn i miss him… i can look inside my heart coz i found him there… till now… i also found a bf tht loves me very much… hehez… in other ppl’s eyes he will never look good… but i told u… if u love someone u’ll never mind his look…
